AT&T SBC F*CK U N ME

My nephew, Tod Goldberg, loves “fucktards” with the same ebuelent enthusiasm as his brother craves unlicensed and self-published fanfiction. Hence, Tod would be every bit as enthusiastic about AT&T as he once was about Duran Duran. The monthly phone bill here at our sumptuous Van Nuys estate is $71.11, and that includes DSL. There are no 3rd party billings allowed — no hidden charges for astrological forcasts or pet rocks from some other marekting company padding the bill. Right now they want over $300. As we pay them on time every month, what’s the problem? PLUS, you try to call them and you get a machine pretending to be a person. I HATE THAT.
Machine: Please tell me exactly what you want to do.
ME: I want to speak to a human being.
Machinge: I’m sorry, I ddn’t quite get that.
ME: well, try www.iamastupidmachinefromhell dot com.
Machine: I’m sorry, I still didn’t quite understand your request.
ME: I request you gargle my manhood.
Machine: was that a yes or a no?
ME: Your motherboard is so ugly …..
Machine: Pay your bill, you cheap ass Jew
Me: Eat Hitler’s Poop, you anti-semitic peice of corporate dung!
Machine: please hold for our next available customer service representative.
<<< ring>>>
<<<< silence>>>
IF YOU WISH TO MAKE A CALL, HANG UP AND TRY AGAIN.

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