Going Bat Sh*t/ You are the Wings on my cake

The former CEO of the leading supplier of body armor to U.S. soldiers
in Iraq was charged yesterday with looting the company to bankroll a
lavish lifestyle that included a $10 million bat mitzvah for his
daughter
TEN MILLION DOLLARS FOR A BAT MITZVAH?????    That’s insane, unless he had Moses and Aaron flown in from the Bosom of Abraham to serve as Rabbi and Cantor, Jesus of Nazareth doing Valet Parking, and Muhammad (pbuh), handling security. But on second thought, Moses, Aaron, Jesus and Muhammad would have done a Bat Mitzvah simply for the mitzvah (blessing/honor/commandment). No, he paid Aerosmith, Eagles, Kenny G and Tom Petty cozmic bucks to perform.

My favorite Bar Mitvah story is my own:   My mom hired Mr. McGee to make little cakes at everyone’s place setting at the reception.  Each cake had a "B" on it (for Burl).   On the day of the event, Mr. McGee calls up. "Mrs Barer. We have a problem. Try as we might, we can’t get the wings to look right."
Wings?
"On the bees."
"BEES?!!!  His name is BURL BARER. Both his first and last name begin with "B" — the letter B doesn’t have any wings!!!"
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

4 Responses to “Going Bat Sh*t/ You are the Wings on my cake”

  1. A Barer

    Burl-
    You shouldn’t worry about the Hebrew name.
    I spotted the problem several years ago and made arrangements to have it fixed.
    I would think your brother would remember. He picked up the bill.
    Alan

    Reply
  2. Mike Barer

    Bar Mitzvahs seem to have become the Jewish version of Christmas. Commercialized to the point where it’s just a matter of who can outdo whom and almost all the spiritual connotation is lost.

    Reply
  3. burl barer

    Well, I’m rather thankful that the Jewish Bar Mitzvah differs from the Moslem version in one significant aspect — circumcision is performed at age 13 in Islam rather than at birth. Instead of “Today I am a man..” we would say “Today I need a local anesthetic”

    Reply

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